Losing a friend

[StealthSpeed3]

I didn't want to post this in the lounge because i figure eveyone has been at this point in their life at some time. So here's my sob story.

I have been close to my friend darcee over the last few years, helping her out and spending time with her when i can. I care for her very much, and came very close to dating her over the time that i got to know her.

We originally met online through a personals site but never figured out how to get a hold of each other without paying. We stopped trying to get a hold of each other and went on with our lives, and i started dating amanda (my ex) in aug/sept. October came around and we were invited to a halloween party in uptown at her friend's place, and i met some frineds of hers, most notably jodi and darcee. I didn't realize it was her until later that week, and we started talking in yahell and getting to know each other more. Hell my christmas present to her was a massage that led to other fun things.

I kept in contact with her on a steady basis, going over to visit, helping her with computer problems, and even tried to set her up with a friend of mine from the cabinet shop which turned out to be a massive fail. The more i talked to her the stronger my feelings grew. When she told me that she was moving to colorado last month i got slightly upset, yet i know that she was moving to see what it was like out there because it was something that she wanted to do after she got out of high school. So monday night i invited her & her roomie (jodi) down to the fine to hear the guys from Licker play. After the band finished we went and hung out downtown at the green mill for a bit then i brought her back home to her apt, thinking that was going to be the last time i was going to see her. We had a small conversation and a very long hug. we said our goodbyes and i headed home.

Yesterday afternoon she sends me a text saying that she was very sore from packing. being the nice guy that i am i offer to come over and give a massage after we finish loading the moving truck. I asked when she wanted me there, the answer i got was NOW; so i headed downtown. We finish packing around 6, her & jodi shower and get cleaned up, and we headed back to the green mill for supper. After a couple hours of bsing and enjoying dinner, once again we go back to the apt bc they had things they needed to take care of this morning.

I spill my heart to her, let her know how i feel about her and what she means to me. I'm not going to lie, i had a hard time letting her go before i got into the car. i tried my damnedest not to cry, and so far i haven't. But i can feel it just sitting in the back of my head, waiting for the floodgates to open. I love her so much and i now feel like she took a piece of my heart with her.

The last time i felt like this i couldn't work, much less concentrate on anything else. That was back when Ariel (previous ex) passed away in 06. Sorry about the long story, but i was just curious how many other people had a similar exp?

this is Dar-C:
http://i85.photobucket.com/albums/k78/SilverBullet98_77/Friends/100_0104.jpg
http://i85.photobucket.com/albums/k78/SilverBullet98_77/Friends/100_0024.jpg
dar-c & jodi on their trip to chicago last year


and this is Ariel:
http://i85.photobucket.com/albums/k78/SilverBullet98_77/Around%20the%20House/ripariel_357.jpg
http://i85.photobucket.com/albums/k78/SilverBullet98_77/Around%20the%20House/Ariel-2.jpg

[ij1889]

its always hard to let go of someone you really care about, even friends, it was hard to leave houston with all my friends and start over again, but atleast she is doing something she has always wanted and ya gotta respect that

[StealthSpeed3]

and while i know it's not a permanent thing it doesn't make it any easier. i know she'll be back to visit. :)

[YSOSLO]

Dude did she say ANYTHING when you told her how you felt? You didn't really elaborate, but if it seemed like she's been having the same type of feelings then don't worry, if it's meant to be she'll be back. I gotta give you props for putting yourself out there like that before it might be too late. If it seemed like she was taken totally off-guard and she talked about the "friendship" etc, then you're probably better off considering her a friend and JUST a friend and the break will help you two have some time to work through your feelings and pick up as friends when she comes back.

[StealthSpeed3]

she did, and she now knows how much i care for her, and now understands why i love her. I told her if she ever needs a place to stay when she comes back my doors are always open for her. The friendship aspect was not even discussed/mentioned.

[GhostMercury]

find out if she feels the same way about you. I have been through this many times because when I get into a relationship I give it my all usually to get heart broken. Time does heal all wounds even though we dont want it to or dont think it will. I promise it does get better, but it takes time. If you do love her don't loose contact with her. Especially if shes not moving there perminantly

[lwrydr]

sux. I dated this chick in Eau Clarie years ago. Things weren't going the greatest for awhile. Then I thought I would commit to our relationship completely, even thought about asking her to marry me.

Go over there one night & she told me she wanted to split up & see other guys. It just ripped my heart out. I could not work or function for days. Saw her a couple times after that but we never got back together.

I'm been remarried 11 years now (divorced from 1st before I met Kerrin),but still think about her from time to time. She was amazing.

[StealthSpeed3]

i did get the chance to talk to her a while back...and she doesn't feel the same about me. :( But such is life, we're still friends and even though i know that's all we are ever going to be as much as it breaks my heart i know that there is someone out there for me who will return the affection & feelings i share.

[Picklz]

Yup just gotta pickup and move on...

http://i266.photobucket.com/albums/ii251/subnetzero/270911970_db35fdd4ca.jpg

[AJ]

Serious cat needs a good tug on the dick.